Come to me, all you who labor and are burdened, and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am meek and humble of heart;
and you will find rest for yourselves.
For my yoke is easy, and my burden light.
This is Jesus' invitation to discipleship in Matthew 11:28-30.
Father Patrick M. Crino, Pastor
In the creation story, when God made man, He tasked him with protecting the Garden (Woman is included in this) and uses the Hebrew word shamar to convey this command. Shamar means to guard and protect, to never lose sight of her, and to celebrate her. Genesis goes on to say a helper suited to man is created. The Hebrew word used is ezer k’negdo. It means helper in the sense that she will bring him strength and power. The fuller meaning in Hebrew literally means that if the man is worthy, she will be a help. If he is not, she will not be a source of strength. So, the initial responsibility to be the guardian and helpmate for this gift was appointed in the Garden. The choice of Adam and Eve to abdicate this critical responsibility continues to have a rippling effect today. Pornography is one of those ripples. And, because of technology, it’s everywhere, all the time. If you weren’t aware, pornography is the single largest industry in the world! It is now referred to as mainstream entertainment. Let’s be clear. God’s image is still there. The original design for our bodies and what it means to be fully male and female are still there.
Pornography is so alluring to so many people because it is a counterfeit representation of the divine act of sex. It looks and feels like the real thing. But, that’s exactly what Satan wants us to believe. Pornography tells the lie that we are primarily sexual beings and therefore require sex, in its many forms, to survive. But, if we understand our origin, we see that we are primarily spiritual beings and, therefore, require God. The fact is there is an ache in every human being to understand his or her identity, which includes an understanding of our sexuality. As a result, we worship whatever we think will satisfy that ache. If we believe the lie that we are primarily sexual, we will worship sex. When this happens, this gift from God becomes a god itself.
Pornography promises sexual freedom and that anything and everything is permissible, as long as it feels good. The lie of sexual freedom is that by telling us to say “yes” to everything, we are not able to say “no” to anything, and we are actually less free and held captive by our passions and temptations. Pornography communicates a message that “sex is no big deal”. The sexual act has immense significance because of the body/soul composite. In truth, “casual sex” is an oxymoron; there is no such thing. Because of our original design, the sexual act forms a powerful union between a man and woman. The two become one. It’s the joining of bodies and souls. Everything about sex is a very big deal.
The lie being bought into is, “you’re not hurting anyone by watching.” But the truth is that the very act of viewing pornography gives tacit approval to whatever sinful act is being viewed. Additionally tragic is that the act of viewing pornography, hijacks the brain’s rewards center into believing that real sexual intimacy is being experienced, thereby releasing a potent chemical cocktail that solidifies neuropathways that crave pixels instead of real people. Yes, people are being hurt, including the one who is watching. The culture now sees pornography as a legitimate pleasure, and is now playing it out in secular society as something good to be taught in middle and high school. If this is the first you are hearing this, I suggest you read the February 7, 2018 article in the New York Times Magazine, entitled What Teenagers Are Learning from Online Porn. It is beyond disturbing.
Being created in God’s image means there is inherent dignity in each person that cannot be taken from us. But here is the thing, a virtuous life doesn’t just happen by accident, it comes with hard work. We will always depend on a Deliverer (Jesus Christ) who alone can make us whole. The endless promises of God’s plan for love and sex are so much more valuable than the lie of pornography. If there is any question, the Catholic Church continues to condemn pornography as a grave offense (CCC2354). In a very real way, because rather than being an expression of a married couple’s intimate union of life and love, sex is reduced to a demeaning source of entertainment and profit center. Pornography is seriously assisting in the destruction of the family. And as St. John Paul II said, as the family goes, so goes the nation, and so goes the whole world we live in. The truth is the further one entrenches themselves in pornography the further they distant themselves from the beauty God has in mind for man and woman.
So, why write an article that addresses pornography leading into Easter? For one, Lent is a time to reflect on the deeper-seated sins that keep us from connecting to God better. I’m writing this article, in a very specific way, for us Catholic men to look much closer at the plague and understand the serious danger pornography represents. Pornography is becoming one of the greatest sins of omission. It is critical to take a stand for that which we love most. It’s time to be the protector and guardians of our wives, sons, and daughters. Adam was given the responsibility to never take his eye off the gift he was given. He did and the consequences are still rippling. The good news is Christ came to reclaim what was lost and to restore the pure and beautiful vision God has for us. Let us not abdicate what we are called to do and be. Let’s not let the man we were created to be become an endangered species any more than he is!